Checking, 1, 2, 3. Check.

Snuggled in a dim bedroom with my oldest and listening to see if the youngest has drifted off for her "nap" yet. She's a short and frequent napper, that one. However, like her sister, she needs usually needs convincing to fall asleep. But for now....silence.

And how about out there?

(Interlude...almost fell asleep for a second there...)

I was so excited that there was some interest in our little homeschool space. I feel like I need to clarify a few things after that post. 1) It does not always look like that! It gets played in, it gets messy, and then it gets cleaned so I can take pictures. 2) I tackle projects like that because I find it to be life giving. I have always loved teaching in whatever capacity I could, and having my own little classroom is a dream come true. I don't invest time and energy in projects that I have no passion for (which is why this will never be a baking blog). 3) I do what I can, when I can. This year has been a rough one, and between the challenges of HG, PPD, and the occasional kidney stone, I've learned to live life to the fullest when I'm feeling well. That makes up for mornings like this, when Sister Stinky is watching Netflix beside me and I'm contemplating a nap myself.

I've been especially thinking about this recently, after reading this post by Haley. It is so wonderful, in so many ways, and she sums up a lot of what I'm feeling in my heart. Part of what I'm learning to accept is the uncertainty of it all. We practice the Creighton model of NFP, and as any NFP practicing couple knows, there's always a touch of uncertainty. We are not pregnant right now, but there's always a chance that we could be before we're planning on it or (as is more likely the case, given out history with it) much later than we would like. Either way - pregnancy, welcoming babies...this is par for the course at this stage of life, which means that the occasional bout of HG or PPD will be, too. And that means that life will, occasionally, totally shut down and I'll be less of the kind of mother I want to be. Survival mode with kick in.

I hope there is at least one other mom out there - maybe even one with PPD or HG who is helped by hearing that she is not the only one who lives her life in anticipation of whenever that "next time" may come for her.

I hope I'm not the only blogger who writes and wonders who is listening. I think this is kind of like the great taboo topic of blogging and I'm kind of embarrassed to even mention it, but sometimes you wonder who, exactly is out there? I was reading this post by the lovely Mandi (and I assure you that you should check out her blog and the blogs she lists and you won't regret it!!) and I was thinking, "500 hits on one post?! I'm thrilled with far less!"

Often, growing a blog is similar to growing a small child - slow, tedious, lots of labor and little returns. BUT there's always that underlying hope that you're reaching someone out there...maybe not as many "someones" as you're hoping for, but hopefully the someone that you need to reach.

So, hello. Good morning. Who's out there? Please know that whoever you are, I am truly glad you're here!

And now...must...close...eyes....


  1. I wasn't talking about 500 hits on one post! I was referring to total daily pageviews (and 500 is quite a bit for me there too). I honestly think I only have maybe three dozen posts EVER (and I've been blogging over 3 years!) that have 500 pageviews. Mostly a few that got some Pinterest play, very few that are actually "from the heart" (almost no one reads those - they read the "how to" type ones - but I write them anyway).

    I haven't had HG, but I really love your post on it because 1) it helped me understand what it is and 2) I've sent it to several people that have had it and they really appreciated it.

    Also...Just an FYI - I clicked on your book on the sidebar and it said "page not found" - you might want to check the link?


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