Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Not perfect...and that's okay!

Linking up with dear Hallie for Five Favorites.

Soooo...I'm not perfect.

You laugh, but let me amend that by saying...I'm not perfect but I am a perfectionist.

In my pre-child days, it was pretty easy to keep up the pretense that I was perfect. Not that I felt perfect, but I felt like I could keep up the pretense. A's in my graduate classes? Check. Professors raving about my papers? Check.

And...well...you're going to think I'm a jerk if I tell you this, but...in all my schooling...from Kindergarten until the end of my Master's degree, I only got one "B" on a report card. The rest were "A"s (and the professor who gave me that B is still a friend of our family's and is kind of proud for that claim to fame). Soooo...yeah. Back when my life seemed to be my own, I thought that I could do things pretty perfectly.

Enter children. And a husband.

Enter hyperemesis gravidarum and post-partum depression.

And then, mix in a healthy dose of no outside feedback. No grades. No report cards.

Suddenly, I've gone from thinking that I can do a lot of things pretty well to wondering if I can do anything right some days,

Yesterday, Sister Nugget and I went to Mass while we were out and the priest (same wonderful man who said Mass in my hospital room after I gave birth to Sister Nugget and who is also helping the Abbot negotiate the waters of dissertation writing) had an awesome homily. It was short, but it was one of those timed perfectly for when I needed to hear it. It was a reminder that God, unlike the world, works through weakness not power. He works through those who are weak, and we can come to know Him through our weaknesses! At some other point, I'd like to share more about how that little kernel of truth has long been a foundational point of my life, but for now, suffice it to say...I needed to hear that. The PPD has sadly still been a struggle this time and it's easy for me to get discouraged and overwhelmed.

But that's okay!

God isn't asking me to mother my daughters perfectly, or to be a perfect wife. He can work through my weaknesses to show His strength. I don't have to be perfect to find God in my vocation! I may be a failure in the eyes of the world at times...but weakness does not equal failure in God's eyes!

Take hope, my friends.

And now, on a lighter note...five favorite things that happened today that weren't perfect but still made for good memories!

-1-


We finally took Sister Nugget on her first ex-utero trip to one of our favorite Carmelite Monasteries. She was less than thrilled and her cries of protest meant we spent about 2 minutes total in the adoration chapel.

But it didn't matter! We got a couple minutes with our sweet Jesus (who is, thankfully, always happy to see little children) and Sister Stinky was elated to see so many statues of saints. The first thing out of her mouth in the chapel was, "I want to see saints!"

We also saw a real, live Carmelite nun, and Sister Stinky was in awe when I told her that she was the same kind of nun as her St. Therese. ("St. Therese. That my saint! That my favorite saint!")

-2-


My personal photography for the day was courtesy of my oldest daughter.

-3-

After the Carmelites, we went to a nearby park that has horses. 

Sister Stinky was so excited to see real horses!

When we arrived, the horses were nowhere in sight. 

She settled for a ride on this lovely saddle. (Hair style courtesy of her mother not being able to locate the hair tie she had been wearing when she was strapped in to her car seat. Moments later it was discovered...hiked up Sister Stinky's leg, ala garter-style.)

-4-


After a bit of a hike, we finally found the horses on the far side of the pasture. Sister Stinky was so excited!

And, she was also quick to comment, "That smell is?"

Horse poop, my love. Horse poop.

-5-


This little piggy cried, "Waaa! Waaa! Waaa!" 

All the way home.




2 comments:

  1. But despite her cries, Sister Nugget is such a cute little piggy:) That's so cool that you live by a monastery AND horses! I can't say the same is true here in the city. And I spent a few minutes in adoration today too!

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  2. Sounds like a fun day. I would have loved to see a Carmelite nun, that is a great memory to be able to share with your daughters.

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